I know that this section is typically just poetry, so I'll include one later. But Glade, I just wanted to congratulate you on writing such a creative and witty poem. Though the rhymes were at times spotty but nevertheless fun, and the meter and rhythm, while inconsistent, detracted none from my enjoyment of this new twist on an old favorite.
Oh, my poem? It's called "Carrot".
<scrambles to find notebook> Here we go. "Carrot."

An orange pinnacle, the cathedral spire
of a vegetable church it seems, because
God is just as in nature as anywhere else.
Yet a pinnacle towards the Heaven of Earth
while still ripe, not yet plucked,
does not categorize it for the consummation
of Consumption, but rather to exist in Earth
more within the dirt than above. Its
leafy stalks creep heavenward but not today.

Penned by my hand on the 10th of Mayan, in the year 265 AF.