Ladies, Gentlemen, Faefolk and Everyone In-Between!

I'm delighted to announce, after months of deliberation, the winners of the Horrible Haiku Contest!

This has been a whirlwind of an event, with dozens of entries to consider, each one more horrible than the last! Before I announce the winners, I want to take this opportunity to thank EVERYONE who submitted their haiku to this contest--you've all contributed to something wonderful, creative, and hilarious, and you should be pleased with yourselves for taking part!

Now, without further ado, the winners!

In third place, with the untilted haiku about treasure hunting, is JIVNO!

"Green fingers delve deep
In search of precious treasure
Orc's nose knows no shame"

In second place, with the haiku "On Hashan Beverages", is ELYON!

"Milk of the first mare
a divine taste sensation
chunky, creamy, good"

And the winner of the contest, with this untitled existential haiku, is CELICA!

"Behold that weird rock
Sitting and being a rock
What a life that is"

Those are our winners! In addition to our winners, we have some honourable mentions, each one collecting 10 credits for their literary efforts!

Our first honourable mention is SMASHY, with "Most Offensively Disgusting Entry"!

"Ello meesah Smashy.
Meesah got powaful gas.
You'sah smell is now."

Our second honourable mention goes to TRUAX, with "Most Political Haiku Duo", featuring a pair of haiku titled "Chivalry"!

"Inside the Castle
Knights feasting on Kephry's dream.
The new Golden Age.

Outside, Aster Town
People beg for food and warmth.
Now just as before."

Our third honourable mention goes to LAORIR, for "Most Questionable Counting", featuring the haiku titled "Seven"!

"One. Two. Three. Four. Five.
One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. Sev?
One. Two. Three. Four. Five."

And our final honourable mention goes to AINA, for "Most Self-Aware Haiku", for this untitled criticism of the poetic art!

"Why did I write this,
An ordered mishmash of words,
Quite pointless really"

I won't lie, if it were up to me, I'd give out more honourable mentions but this is where I ran out of credits! Once again, a huge thank you to everyone who took part in this contest! As promised, a book is being put together at this time collecting all the entries into one horrible tome, so keep your eye on the news for a future post announcing its availability!

Congratulations to our winners, and to all our participants!

Sincerely,
Taelle Si'Talvace

Penned by my hand on the 14th of Daedalan, in the year 916 AF.