What a turn-out! I dare say, the public response has been sublime! While
I would like to say that I could have predicted such, that would be a
stretch of the truth, and I pride myself on being a woman of integrity.
Needless to say, I hope we've all learned a valuable lesson here. That
lesson being: There Is No Such Thing As Bad Press. Congratulations to
you, Faladis, I hope your book is flying off the shelves, I'm sure the
attention and publicity (be it positive or negative) has boosted your
sales. Perhaps Shallam will get that bookcase which you feel the City so
desperately needs. Garden knows many would agree it's high time some
literacy programs are encouraged within the jewel. Though, one has to
wonder, if the populous of Shallam were to take a moment's pause to
crack open a book, what would happen to the poor orphans? Alas, I
digress...

I'm surely not the only one to notice Faladis' book has now become the
subject of numerous scathing posts (my own included), and again, I have
to say, "Huzzah!" Being a fair-minded lass, I decided to take a second
look at the novella, thinking it wise to simply read the tome from the
perspective of a gentle reader, rather than an Occultist from Ashtan,
let alone as the mortal Voice of Sin. So, I helped the humgii at the
main gate of Ashtan cough up the copy I'd fed to it mere moment's
before. Unfortunately the combination of saliva and stomach acid made it
nearly illegible. Thankfully I was able to secure a copy from a local
farmers union before it headed to their compost heap, as local
agriculturalist believe this book makes an excellent fertilizer. This is
a fact I can attest to, as my own flowers have been much more vibrant
since adding a few choice pages to my flowerpot. Be sure to check out a
sample of these enviable blooms at the Silver Rose in Delos (NE E E E of
the Delos Bridge).

Though I was moderately successful at setting my bias aside, I stand
firm that the characters are wooden. Yet, to be fair, the characters are
not nearly as stiff as the crisply starched cotton shirts for sale at A
Brilliant Idea (NE E from Central Market in Ashtan). Stiffness need not
be considered a negative by any means; indeed, Father Coldraven of
Mhaldor swears by the crisp stiffness of my starched shirts, though it
should be made known that he prefers to procure his at the shop called
Vanity in Mhaldor (SW of the Chamber of Statues). Again, I found the
brief exchange of tender glances passed between the protagonist and the
Occultist's crone to be rather sweet. However, as sweet as this moment
in the story was, it paled in comparison to the sweetness of the
chocolate raspberry butterflies available at The Cauldron of Chaos (SW
of Central Market in Ashtan). Aside from the sweetness of chocolates,
there is little else that could compare to the endearing, albeit brief,
interlude between the protagonist and his would-be foes. Well, I take
that back, the caramel-filled chocolate fairies stocked at Needful
Things (NW N of Central Market in Ashtan) come darn close.

My statement about the book being a suitable form of punishment for
children may have been a bit hasty. Why just the other day, I told my
son Gizmo that he was grounded and to prepare himself for a spanking. It
was the darnedest thing, the lil fuzzy bloke shoved a copy of Faladis'
book down the back of his trousers to act as a barrier between himself
and my belt. I was beside myself laughing at his ingenious antics, and I
dare say the tome set the stage for a memorable family moment which is
sure to provide a barrel of laughter for years to come. So I think it's
safe to say this book is the basis of tremendous entertainment.

Yours most sincerely, and most sincerely amused,
Dr. Tekla Aristata Yuy D'Stellis


Penned by my hand on the 12th of Glacian, in the year 419 AF.