There's a dadgum sickness in the realm,
It's every place I look!
It lives in every city,
And it hides in every nook!
It done took all you peoples,
And it twisted up yer minds!
It gots the Humans, Grooks, and Dwarves,
Plus all them other kinds!
This nasty, dirty thinkin' gots
Yer brains all mixed and muddled!
So keep away from me until
Yer got yer heads unfuzzled!
I tells yer now, so listen good,
I'll puts it in the news!
I ain't never never never
Gonna wear no stinkin' shoes!

I mean it. Keep 'em offa my feets!

Calisse, Poem Doer

Penned by my hand on the 12th of Sarapin, in the year 960 AF.