Gaze backwards with me, once beloved
to troubled shores and gilded waves
bygone days of fare abandoned
why did you have to go away?

all that I had ever wanted
was more of you, your time, your smile
to your heartbeat I was bonded
nearness you couldn't reconcile

is it better now that i believe
that none of it had meant a thing
than to think t'was by my hand
you changed your mind on everything

it fills the hole you left inside me
bile, hurt, resentment too
when all i want is to be wanted
by the person i had thought was you

i wonder if someday i'll know
just what was wrong with wanting that
which you clearly could have given me
but chose to give to somene else

when you were the one who chose me first
and told me you were far too happy
to stay beside me evermore
and left to wander distant shores

i struggle still that you rejected
everything you once requested
i gave you everything of me
and you apparently called me clingy

so i tell myself you never cared
that you lied and laughed and left
but i know that in there somewhere
is the woman for whom my heart's bereft

so though it's driven me half-mad
i miss you, i miss you, i miss you
i'm a mess, just like this poem
and i fear no remedy will do

Penned by my hand on the 7th of Sarapin, in the year 955 AF.