on page one of your journal
describe yourself
who are you and were you and would you be
what made you think you could be
how could you
answer with a forthrightness
you could never speak aloud
on page two of your journal
list every thought you have ever had
and why each was wrong
do not seek to justify any
only know that they were your mistake
omissions, whether in shame or negligence,
are noticed
on page three of your journal
entomb your hope
nobody will find it
if you bury it here
promise
on page four of your journal
beg, gush, deny, and shriek
wring your self dry
your passions must stain the paper
leave nothing unspilled
on page five of your journal
narrate how you will die
as lurid in detail as you dare
pay particular care to the exact moment
that you stop being
include your memorial
assume the worst
on page six of your journal
make your offering
excised from your heartmind
words are optional but
ensure you would never be the same
if given the chance
on page seven of your journal

Penned by my hand on the 11th of Mayan, in the year 924 AF.