Holding onto memories& the memories we shared.
You are haunting me like a ghost, no... youre not really there.
Like so many before you, you have dispersed into thin air.
And no matter how hard I try to pretend Im fine, my heart is laid bare.

I am falling apart, everyone can see. Am I fooling them or myself?
As I try to repair my heart, building up walls, blocks of an ice shelf.
Faces surround me, so I fake smiles and laughs. Pretending&
The taste of rum only dulls the ache, the distance between us almost sickening.

I am told, my waiting around is useless but you, you left your mark on me.
Though we said no vows I am bound to you for eternity.
I am a fool for you and I am losing my sanity.
Though, maybe this is punishment, for all the crimes I harmfully committed.

No matter how much my soul yearns for you, you still dont return.
This feeling of losing you, is almost too much.. A deep slow, painful burn.
Trying to keep my mind distracted, to no avail...
All the places we spent time together, remind me and the pain prevails.

When will this torture end? Is this a test to see how much sorrow my conscience can take?
Havent I paid my dues enough? Am I doomed to suffer a continuous heartbreaking fate?
Please return to me soon& my true soulmate& I do not know how much longer I can wait&
Am afraid this deep hole in my heart that you left truly will consume me, making me dissipate.



Penned by my hand on the 20th of Phaestian, in the year 852 AF.